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When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip to Italy. You buy a bunch
of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans--The Coliseum, The Michelangelo, David and
Gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several
hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes on and says "Welcome to Holland".
"Holland? What do you mean Holland" I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've
dreamed of going to Italy!"
But there has been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence,
famine and disease. It is just a different place.
So, you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you
will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It is just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a
while and you catch your breath, you look around and begin to notice that Holland has windmills. Holland
has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they're all bragging about what a
wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will always say, "Yes, that's where I was
supposed to go. That's what I had planned".
And the pain of that will never, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.
But, if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy
the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.